[ Just a little bit longer, he thinks. Just a little bit longer, and he would have been healed enough, would have gotten adjusted to the ache and emptiness left behind that he would have been able to walk out the door to pretend that everything fine. A little disguise, and no one would have been the wiser, save for his staff, who wouldn't dare say a word to anyone.
Except Xie Lian.
All he can do is stare at him, unable to move even as Xie Lian crosses the room to him. The pain in his voice just continues to cement that kind heart in place for him, the fact that he's hurting for Hua Cheng. That heart has gotten him into trouble, caused him suffering, but he wouldn't dare let anyone take that from him - such a kind person is one that the world needs, but perhaps doesn't deserve, when all it's done is take and take.
Gods, Hua Cheng just wants to give - and here he is, giving him a fright, causing him pain, too.
But his eye flutters closed, eyebrows a little pinched but a smile still slowly curling on his face. Because these strong hands are so soft, so tender, and he simply lets them hold him, bringing his hands up to fold long fingers around his wrists. His ears flick back, but don't pin, as if just being touched so softly is healing in itself.
Maybe it is. There's no magical cureall that clears away the clear chemical burn on his face, nothing that dries away the blood, nothing that restores his eye. But Hua Cheng relaxes into the touch, tilting his uninjured cheek into Xie Lian's palm. ]
I was hoping gege wouldn't have to see me like this. [ His deep voice is low in a different quality - tired, because even if he's used to pain, it's still left him drained. Taking care of Beau and Futaba, getting them to Shinobu, limping his way home... it's been a tiring 24 hours. ] It's gone.
[ No it looks worse than it is, no it's all fine, just two words of frank honesty. He doesn't say anything about how it hurts, because - if it's gone, of course it does. But he weathers through it like he has every other storm that he's faced, each bout of suffering that he's been put through. ]
xie lian's heart lurches for san lang. he can put two and two together, and the thought of him hurting so much makes xie lian ache. his brows knit together, confusion and worry all at once. it takes him a moment to respond, though, as he processes, and the first part of what hua cheng says to him is what sticks the furthest down, twinges old memories that have yet to be buried quite right. with one gentle stroke of his thumbs, xie lian speaks, his tone taking on just the slightest, softest edge of a chide. it's no angry scolding; it rings with empathy and concern, a genuine, fierce emotion that he's come to associate very much with his san lang. ]
San Lang ah. [ his thumbs tap, very gently, against his cheekbones, far from the wound, but xie lian holds hua cheng's gaze if he'll let him, ducking his head underneath if he looks down. ] You standing alone and bearing the brunt of your suffering.... is that not the most painful thing there is? To know there's nothing I could do while you were in pain?
[ he quotes san lang's own words back to him, not cruelly, not meanly, just making the same point he had made for him just a week ago. there's not a chance he could forget what hua cheng had said to him in that horrific nightmare. it's the kind of thing that will stick with xie lian for a lifetime, meant more than he could ever possibly describe out loud, and if he has the chance to return the favor to san lang (as he must return so many favors), then xie lian will do so, pouring all of the compassion in his body into this person, all of the love and kindness he has to give. ] To think this world is all perfectly rosy while you suffer in silence is the worst pain I can imagine. If I can do something, even if it's small, then I want to do something. You protect me from nothing in telling me nothing, because... I want to walk this path beside you, not leagues ahead of you, or above you. Whether it's good, or bad, or something silly in between, I want to be there to support you, in all of the ways you've helped me.
[ he tries for a smile. it's small, just the corner of his mouth lifting; he's standing by what he's said, a proud flint to his eyes that's been there for eight hundred years. even in the slightest bit of awkward hesitation after such an impassioned speech, it still rings true. but, still, xie lian wants to reassure san lang, that he thinks no differently of him, that if xie lian will help it, everything will be fine. that san lang will be fine.
he thumbs one last time, trying to catch his gaze properly. ] ...will you tell me what happened?
[ A soft laugh escapes him, close to a chuff, as he's so gently chided. But Hua Cheng can feel the primary course of it, the gentleness, the compassion. There is no one quite like Xie Lian, and he doubts there will ever be anyone like him. This lifetime, this world, any world - there's only Xie Lian.
His gaze lifts up to meet his when he ducks his head, rather than something so close to shying away as he could ever get. Because how could he look away, when he's so close to him?
Especially when he hears such familiar words being repeated back to him. His own just desserts, perhaps. Slowly, he strokes the fingers of one hand down the back of Xie Lian's knuckles, curling them back around his wrist when he returns there, as if he could hold onto him and everything would be fine. No nightmares can reach them here, in the waking world, when the two of them are together like this. ]
To stand by your side, to protect you as you protect me, that's the paradise I would truly build with my own hands. [ Affirming Xie Lian's words, supporting them, seeking that validation for them both. Xie Lian gives him that love, and for as much as he doesn't feel he deserves it, Hua Cheng will embrace it, cherish it the same as he does his daozhang. ] Since the day that we met, gege, and however long you'll stay.
[ Because Hua Cheng certainly has no intentions of going anywhere. Slowly, he lifts his head a little more, without leaving his touch. That dark, twinkling eye looks at him directly. No hiding. ]
Sit down? [ Selfishly, he would rather continue being held. ]
[ it's a little funny--if it wasn't for the ears, it would be easy to mistake this san lang for his own. they speak in such similar ways, and the gravity to his words feel like truth. there's no niceties here, because xie lian knows that hua cheng would never do such things. there's no secret dislike, or an attempt at lying to him, either. just hua cheng, who always seems to know exactly what to say, when xie lian needs to hear it. the sense of equality they've built in the universe that xie lian knows best continues even here, when they're nowhere near an even playing field.
his expression shifts into a soft smile, again, as hua cheng holds onto him, as he looks. ] If this life is a banquet, then I'll stay with you, until this banquet reaches its end. [ though that phrase means nothing to hua cheng, it's become something important to xie lian, since their conversation in the space. he wants to affirm hua cheng just as much as he is to him, now that he's the one in trouble.
at his request, xie lian nods. he slowly removes his hands, fingertips coming off of his face, before xie lian shifts to settle next to him. there's a moment of pause. he's not sure what to do, but he wants to keep comforting san lang... so, after a moment, he just sort of awkwardly turns his palms up, arms opening a little. if he. wants to come over here. or put his head on his shoulder, or his lap.
[ All of his tails sweep to one side as Xie Lian goes to sit, spilling over each other and the lounge, and he takes in the smile on his face in the meantime. Until it reaches its end? Almost immediately, Hua Cheng knows what he wants to say - to bolster that equality, to give him a lifelong promise, to be his most dedicated follower even in this lifetime. Xie Lian, time and again, has given him his life.
Given him a purpose, beyond retribution for the wrongs paid to him. A helping hand was offered to him in the dark, and he dare not let go. ]
Then, I hope this banquet never ends. [ I pray I never rest in peace.
But then, there's brief surprise visible on his marred face, seeing Xie Lian's hands spread like that. It takes a moment, two, before he slips forward. Like the fox that he is, a wild animal tentative towards human contact, until it all melts away the moment he's close enough to the human body next to him. He dips forward, gaze flicking up to Xie Lian's face a moment, before he practically nuzzles into his space. Better to accept the offer before it's rescinded, before gege thinks on second thought.
Hua Cheng fits against him, his dark hair tucked just under Xie Lian's jaw, letting him press close to the thrumming pulse he can feel at his throat. ]
[ xie lian wants to be a safe place for hua cheng, as hua cheng has been for him. therefore, at his brief hesitance, he doesn't move, keeping his hands open, trying to give him a welcoming smile -- and then lets out a little "oof" as he's suddenly accosted with a whole lot of boy.
it doesn't bother xie lian, though, and a little laugh escapes him. it's hua cheng. he's different than anyone else in this world, and as he enters xie lian's space, he merely lifts his sleeves up and out of the way to make sure they don't get pinned as hua cheng makes himself comfortable. it's not abnormal, especially not after algos academy, where this sort of thing was basically day to day, and he learned there that san lang likes to be held and would often worm his way in without much announcement of it.
so! his arms drape carefully across hua cheng's back, and he lifts his wrist to reach up and... oh, finally, scratch him behind those soft, fluffy fox ears. if this is the easiest way for xie lian to bring san lang comfort, then he can't say he's complaining, and he hums a soft, inquisitive noise at san lang's statement, one that vibrates in his throat near where san lang has settled himself. ]
I'll decide for myself what's dangerous and what isn't, thank you. [ he points out with a huff of amusement, soft, even if his cheeks are a bit pink. ] So you'll have to be a bit more specific.
[ xie lian has never felt safer than he does with hua cheng, and he'd... he'd like to return the favor. if this is what helps, then so be it. (it is no great sacrifice, holding him in his arms, scratching his fingers through his dark hair. it is a chance to return some of the endless care that hua cheng has given him.) ]
[ For someone as strong as him, it wouldn't take much to attack. Even Xie Lian would be caught off guard with this proximity and trust, and wouldn't come out of it unscathed. But there's no desire to harm him, as he holds him, wrapping his arms around his middle and weaseling to make sure that all of him fits. He's long, lean, but broad-shouldered and solid regardless - yet there's no difficulty in fitting against the small, compact, strong Xie Lian that folds him into his sleeves, into his arms.
In an instant, Hua Cheng melts against Xie Lian, his ears flicking back with an absolute contentedness that truly shouldn't be achievable. He's happy, despite all of the chaos, the pain, the things that have happened over the course of a month. (Of a lifetime.) He nuzzles his nose under Xie Lian's jaw, heedless of his injury, because it doesn't matter.
He's being held in Xie Lian's arms. There are important things to talk about, but with some shifting, the two of them take up the entirety of the lounge like this. And he's shameless about it. ]
If you offer me your arms like this too much, I'll never want to leave them. [ Don't you know how much he loves you, even in this world? ] But if gege wants to pet my ears like this, who am I to tell him to stop, anyways?
[ ...oh. well, that's a bit embarrassing. he mumbles, ] Such shameless things come out of your mouth so easily.. [ but doesn't follow up much more than that, which is xie lian speak for "that's embarrassing but i like it", definitely. his scold has zero heat.
xie lian just lets hua cheng get comfortable. once he's settled perfectly, xie lian adjusts, and gently rests his chin on top of hua cheng's head, being especially careful not to mess up his injury. he even reaches down to gently adjust hua cheng's chin with gentle, sure fingers, so the burnt side of his face isn't pressed directly into his chest like that, because he's pretty sure that san lang actually doesn't care but xie lian does. he shouldn't have to be in any pain, at all.
the new angle lets him scratch and scratch away, which is very nice, too. he ends up smiling a little more than he means to, softly down at the head of ink black hair now tucked against him. as hua cheng relaxes, so too does xie lian, and the little warmth in his chest that has been building and building for san lang flickers happily, as if he's found his way home. (in a way, it feels like he has.) ] I'll pet them as much as you'd like, though I still would like to know what happened.
[ Heart giving a little jump at the touch to his chin, there's no resistance as he settles into place where he's put, cheek against his chest more carefully now. The dull throb of pain is still there, and his head is killing him even hours and hours later, but... but Xie Lian's fingers in his hair, scratching behind his velvet-soft ears, is enough to help soothe things away.
At least make them more tolerable, now, as he curls his legs up - tucking them under Xie Lian's, letting him prop them up like that.
Of course, he can only bask innocently for so long.
Hm, damn. But Hua Cheng knew that he couldn't escape it for long, not when Xie Lian is always so astute when it comes to other people. He hums a low, content noise, something that reverberates all the way into the pit of his chest. If he were a cat, it would be a purr; as it is, he just sighs, tails flicking before settling in all the open spaces left by their legs and the lounge. ]
I know gege doesn't drink, but surely he still knows of the winery here in Umite? [ He doesn't wait for a response. ] The daughter of the owners is someone that I know quite well. Beau. She and Kano came to me for help, after the market, because they landed themselves in some trouble. But someone was selling things that they shouldn't have been, gems and potions that contained blood, things like that, and she wanted to find who the source was.
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Except Xie Lian.
All he can do is stare at him, unable to move even as Xie Lian crosses the room to him. The pain in his voice just continues to cement that kind heart in place for him, the fact that he's hurting for Hua Cheng. That heart has gotten him into trouble, caused him suffering, but he wouldn't dare let anyone take that from him - such a kind person is one that the world needs, but perhaps doesn't deserve, when all it's done is take and take.
Gods, Hua Cheng just wants to give - and here he is, giving him a fright, causing him pain, too.
But his eye flutters closed, eyebrows a little pinched but a smile still slowly curling on his face. Because these strong hands are so soft, so tender, and he simply lets them hold him, bringing his hands up to fold long fingers around his wrists. His ears flick back, but don't pin, as if just being touched so softly is healing in itself.
Maybe it is. There's no magical cureall that clears away the clear chemical burn on his face, nothing that dries away the blood, nothing that restores his eye. But Hua Cheng relaxes into the touch, tilting his uninjured cheek into Xie Lian's palm. ]
I was hoping gege wouldn't have to see me like this. [ His deep voice is low in a different quality - tired, because even if he's used to pain, it's still left him drained. Taking care of Beau and Futaba, getting them to Shinobu, limping his way home... it's been a tiring 24 hours. ] It's gone.
[ No it looks worse than it is, no it's all fine, just two words of frank honesty. He doesn't say anything about how it hurts, because - if it's gone, of course it does. But he weathers through it like he has every other storm that he's faced, each bout of suffering that he's been put through. ]
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xie lian's heart lurches for san lang. he can put two and two together, and the thought of him hurting so much makes xie lian ache. his brows knit together, confusion and worry all at once. it takes him a moment to respond, though, as he processes, and the first part of what hua cheng says to him is what sticks the furthest down, twinges old memories that have yet to be buried quite right. with one gentle stroke of his thumbs, xie lian speaks, his tone taking on just the slightest, softest edge of a chide. it's no angry scolding; it rings with empathy and concern, a genuine, fierce emotion that he's come to associate very much with his san lang. ]
San Lang ah. [ his thumbs tap, very gently, against his cheekbones, far from the wound, but xie lian holds hua cheng's gaze if he'll let him, ducking his head underneath if he looks down. ] You standing alone and bearing the brunt of your suffering.... is that not the most painful thing there is? To know there's nothing I could do while you were in pain?
[ he quotes san lang's own words back to him, not cruelly, not meanly, just making the same point he had made for him just a week ago. there's not a chance he could forget what hua cheng had said to him in that horrific nightmare. it's the kind of thing that will stick with xie lian for a lifetime, meant more than he could ever possibly describe out loud, and if he has the chance to return the favor to san lang (as he must return so many favors), then xie lian will do so, pouring all of the compassion in his body into this person, all of the love and kindness he has to give. ] To think this world is all perfectly rosy while you suffer in silence is the worst pain I can imagine. If I can do something, even if it's small, then I want to do something. You protect me from nothing in telling me nothing, because... I want to walk this path beside you, not leagues ahead of you, or above you. Whether it's good, or bad, or something silly in between, I want to be there to support you, in all of the ways you've helped me.
[ he tries for a smile. it's small, just the corner of his mouth lifting; he's standing by what he's said, a proud flint to his eyes that's been there for eight hundred years. even in the slightest bit of awkward hesitation after such an impassioned speech, it still rings true. but, still, xie lian wants to reassure san lang, that he thinks no differently of him, that if xie lian will help it, everything will be fine. that san lang will be fine.
he thumbs one last time, trying to catch his gaze properly. ] ...will you tell me what happened?
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His gaze lifts up to meet his when he ducks his head, rather than something so close to shying away as he could ever get. Because how could he look away, when he's so close to him?
Especially when he hears such familiar words being repeated back to him. His own just desserts, perhaps. Slowly, he strokes the fingers of one hand down the back of Xie Lian's knuckles, curling them back around his wrist when he returns there, as if he could hold onto him and everything would be fine. No nightmares can reach them here, in the waking world, when the two of them are together like this. ]
To stand by your side, to protect you as you protect me, that's the paradise I would truly build with my own hands. [ Affirming Xie Lian's words, supporting them, seeking that validation for them both. Xie Lian gives him that love, and for as much as he doesn't feel he deserves it, Hua Cheng will embrace it, cherish it the same as he does his daozhang. ] Since the day that we met, gege, and however long you'll stay.
[ Because Hua Cheng certainly has no intentions of going anywhere. Slowly, he lifts his head a little more, without leaving his touch. That dark, twinkling eye looks at him directly. No hiding. ]
Sit down? [ Selfishly, he would rather continue being held. ]
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his expression shifts into a soft smile, again, as hua cheng holds onto him, as he looks. ] If this life is a banquet, then I'll stay with you, until this banquet reaches its end. [ though that phrase means nothing to hua cheng, it's become something important to xie lian, since their conversation in the space. he wants to affirm hua cheng just as much as he is to him, now that he's the one in trouble.
at his request, xie lian nods. he slowly removes his hands, fingertips coming off of his face, before xie lian shifts to settle next to him. there's a moment of pause. he's not sure what to do, but he wants to keep comforting san lang... so, after a moment, he just sort of awkwardly turns his palms up, arms opening a little. if he. wants to come over here. or put his head on his shoulder, or his lap.
... or something. how embarrassing. ]
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Given him a purpose, beyond retribution for the wrongs paid to him. A helping hand was offered to him in the dark, and he dare not let go. ]
Then, I hope this banquet never ends. [ I pray I never rest in peace.
But then, there's brief surprise visible on his marred face, seeing Xie Lian's hands spread like that. It takes a moment, two, before he slips forward. Like the fox that he is, a wild animal tentative towards human contact, until it all melts away the moment he's close enough to the human body next to him. He dips forward, gaze flicking up to Xie Lian's face a moment, before he practically nuzzles into his space. Better to accept the offer before it's rescinded, before gege thinks on second thought.
Hua Cheng fits against him, his dark hair tucked just under Xie Lian's jaw, letting him press close to the thrumming pulse he can feel at his throat. ]
... dangerous to offer such a thing, gege.
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it doesn't bother xie lian, though, and a little laugh escapes him. it's hua cheng. he's different than anyone else in this world, and as he enters xie lian's space, he merely lifts his sleeves up and out of the way to make sure they don't get pinned as hua cheng makes himself comfortable. it's not abnormal, especially not after algos academy, where this sort of thing was basically day to day, and he learned there that san lang likes to be held and would often worm his way in without much announcement of it.
so! his arms drape carefully across hua cheng's back, and he lifts his wrist to reach up and... oh, finally, scratch him behind those soft, fluffy fox ears. if this is the easiest way for xie lian to bring san lang comfort, then he can't say he's complaining, and he hums a soft, inquisitive noise at san lang's statement, one that vibrates in his throat near where san lang has settled himself. ]
I'll decide for myself what's dangerous and what isn't, thank you. [ he points out with a huff of amusement, soft, even if his cheeks are a bit pink. ] So you'll have to be a bit more specific.
[ xie lian has never felt safer than he does with hua cheng, and he'd... he'd like to return the favor. if this is what helps, then so be it. (it is no great sacrifice, holding him in his arms, scratching his fingers through his dark hair. it is a chance to return some of the endless care that hua cheng has given him.) ]
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In an instant, Hua Cheng melts against Xie Lian, his ears flicking back with an absolute contentedness that truly shouldn't be achievable. He's happy, despite all of the chaos, the pain, the things that have happened over the course of a month. (Of a lifetime.) He nuzzles his nose under Xie Lian's jaw, heedless of his injury, because it doesn't matter.
He's being held in Xie Lian's arms. There are important things to talk about, but with some shifting, the two of them take up the entirety of the lounge like this. And he's shameless about it. ]
If you offer me your arms like this too much, I'll never want to leave them. [ Don't you know how much he loves you, even in this world? ] But if gege wants to pet my ears like this, who am I to tell him to stop, anyways?
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xie lian just lets hua cheng get comfortable. once he's settled perfectly, xie lian adjusts, and gently rests his chin on top of hua cheng's head, being especially careful not to mess up his injury. he even reaches down to gently adjust hua cheng's chin with gentle, sure fingers, so the burnt side of his face isn't pressed directly into his chest like that, because he's pretty sure that san lang actually doesn't care but xie lian does. he shouldn't have to be in any pain, at all.
the new angle lets him scratch and scratch away, which is very nice, too. he ends up smiling a little more than he means to, softly down at the head of ink black hair now tucked against him. as hua cheng relaxes, so too does xie lian, and the little warmth in his chest that has been building and building for san lang flickers happily, as if he's found his way home. (in a way, it feels like he has.) ] I'll pet them as much as you'd like, though I still would like to know what happened.
[ you have not distracted him yet, sir! ]
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At least make them more tolerable, now, as he curls his legs up - tucking them under Xie Lian's, letting him prop them up like that.
Of course, he can only bask innocently for so long.
Hm, damn. But Hua Cheng knew that he couldn't escape it for long, not when Xie Lian is always so astute when it comes to other people. He hums a low, content noise, something that reverberates all the way into the pit of his chest. If he were a cat, it would be a purr; as it is, he just sighs, tails flicking before settling in all the open spaces left by their legs and the lounge. ]
I know gege doesn't drink, but surely he still knows of the winery here in Umite? [ He doesn't wait for a response. ] The daughter of the owners is someone that I know quite well. Beau. She and Kano came to me for help, after the market, because they landed themselves in some trouble. But someone was selling things that they shouldn't have been, gems and potions that contained blood, things like that, and she wanted to find who the source was.